Writing your concluding paragraph

Writing a good conclusion is tricky! (Just like writing the rest of the essay!) I’ve been reading a lot of conclusions recently and I am trying to put my finger on what makes a good one, which is not an easy job. You shouldn’t just repeat your main points, because the reader has read them already. I think one of the most important things to do is to think about the message that you want to leave the reader with. After all your hard work – so what? What did you discover? What was the point of the essay?

In the last couple of posts I’ve been thinking about this essay title:

“Is the present level of immigration in the United Kingdom beneficial to the country?”

I have come up with this conclusion:

In conclusion, it does seem that there are some very real economic and social benefits to be enjoyed from the number of migrant workers that have come to the UK recently. The strain on public services has been blamed on immigration, however it is the government that has failed to put extra money into these services whilst reaping the rewards of economic growth and greater tax revenues. It is not sustainable to follow an ‘open door’ policy towards European workers without supporting communities to cope with a bigger population. The current level of immigration can only continue to be beneficial if the national and local government respond to the needs of a bigger and more diverse population.

This conclusion is a strong one because:

1. It briefly mentions the strongest points

2. It has a message

3. It suggests a course of action to take in the future

As usual I’d like to leave you with a useful link which has some really good comments (and more links!) about writing conclusions. Today’s link is the online writing workshop from Purdue University.

Writing the main paragraphs of your essay

This post is about writing your main paragraphs and the most important point to make here is that of having a strong first sentence which presents the main idea of your paragraph. This sentence is often called your topic sentence. In an argumentative essay this sentence will present a strong argument. Look at the last post to see the plan and the introduction for the essay title:

“Is the present level of immigration in the United Kingdom beneficial to the country?”

This is the start of my first main paragraph after the introduction:

There is a widespread perception shared by big business and the government that the United Kingdom has benefited from immigration because these new workers firstly take certain low paid jobs which the existing population decline to take, and secondly, and more importantly, they help to overcome skill shortages in the country.

This is a good topic sentence because it:
1. puts forward an argument
2. it uses words from the title (which means you are hopefully answering the question)
3. it tells you what the rest of the sentence is going to be about.

After this sentence you need to support what you have said. That means giving evidence which justifies what you said in your topic sentence. Often this is when you will bring in your sources and refer to other people’s work and this is where referencing is so important (see “Referencing” post).

I would like to direct you to Andy Gillett’s site at the University of Hertfordshire which has some good exercises on topic sentences. Of course the danger of sending you there is that you won’t come back here! When you get to the writing page following this link click on TOPIC at the top of the page for topic sentence exercises.

Writing the introduction to your essay

Writing an introduction to your essay is not easy. You only get one chance to make a first impression and this is it. If you are writing an essay outside class then you don’t have to write your introduction first, you could write it at after your main paragraphs and insert it at the beginning and there are good reasons for doing this. Obviously, if you are in an exam this is not going to work, and you will need to write your introduction first. But remember what I said last time about planning and don’t even think about starting to write your introduction until you have a plan! Your plan might look something like this:

Essay question: “Is the present level of immigration in the United Kingdom beneficial to the country?”

Plan:

Introduction:
-always in news, controversial issue, difficult issue – lack of good data/anecdotal evidence
-immigrants from new European Union countries, immigrants from other countries/refugees/asylum seekers
-give outline of essay
Main paragraph 1
- positive economic arguments – good for economy, fill labour and skill shortages, – doctors, nurses, teachers, farm workers
Main paragraph 2
- negative economic arguments – other view point -takes jobs from natives, drives down wages – evidence??
Main paragraph 3
- social impact – difficult to quantify – diverse multiracial communities, good or bad? Impact on provision of govt services – health/schooling
Conclusion:
-generally beneficial impact on UK, though some pressure on public services – govt should spend more money on these

Your plan should be written in note form. From this plan an introduction might look something like:

Immigration is an emotive subject which is seldom out of the news. The recent rise in immigrants in the United Kingdom from the new European Union countries has refocused debate on this controversial issue. It is a topic which is difficult to explore because of the lack of hard data and the preponderance of anecdotal evidence. As already mentioned, immigration recently has largely consisted of Europeans but there is also a constant flow of migrants from other parts of the world, some of whom arrive seeking refuge from war or famine and some of whom claim asylum. This essay will attempt to explore the benefits to the UK of immigration by firstly examining the economic arguments surrounding the issue, and then by looking at the social issues involved.

This introduction makes a good start to the essay because it:

1. says why the topic is important

2. says what difficulties there may be in answering the question

3. defines terms

4. gives an outline of the essay which is to follow

There are set phrases which you can learn to use in your introduction such as This essay will attempt to explore this issue by…. you can see more phrases like this in the Academic Phrasebank at Manchester University and of course this site is always on my list of favourite links on the right-hand side of the page. The other site you should look at is Andy Gillett’s site at the University of Hertforshire and the part on Writing introductions (also in my list of favourites).